www.dictionary.com defines curse as:

•  the expression of a wish that misfortune, evil, doom, etc., befall a person, group, etc.
• a formula or charm intended to cause such misfortune to another.

We, the sports fan, are all too familiar with it.  We breathe it, live it, and become immersed with it.  Any true fan knows the story of the famous Billy Goat Curse, William “Billy Goat” Sianis bought two tickets to the 1945 World Series to watch the Cubs vs. the Detroit Tigers.  Sianis’ 2nd ticket was to take the goat to the game.  Cubs owner Mr. Wrigley objected to this because the goat smelled (he evidently hasn’t been to a Cincinnati Reds game in the middle of August, the goat would be a pleasant smell).  The story continues that Mr. Sianis placed a curse on The Cubs (to read more on the curse please visit http://www.karlschatz.com/yearofthegoat/archives/000092.shtml).  Yada Yada Yada, The beloved Cubs haven’t won a World Series since 1908.

The other famous professional sports curse is that of the Bambino.  The Boston Red Sox traded away the greatest player in the history of the sport, Babe Ruth to the hated New York Yankees   At that point in time, 1920, the Red Sox were a power house and the Yankees an afterthought.  Although many skeptics (see Mike Golic) don’t believe in curses, hard core fans (see Mike Greenberg) certainly do.  With the curse in place, the Red Sox went from 1918 to October of 2004 without a championship while the hated Yankees went on to win 26 titles during that time frame.  That has to sting.

There are plenty of moments to be told of both curses.  Most notably, Bill Buckner’s error in game 6 of the 1986 World Series vs. The New York Mets (replayed far too many times on every World Series history show known to man) which led to a Mets come back and ultimate victory.  For the Cubs, a fan comes to mind.  Yeah, a fan.  With 5 outs to go for a World Series appearance, innocent, loyal fan Steve Bartman reaches for a foul ball and steals it from Moises Alou, see picture.  Bartman was vilified and his life has been dramatically changed.  A little harsh but I understand.  Sick, I know.

All of this may sound like too much to take.  Oh contraire my friend, oh contraire.  That is nothing compared to what I have in store for you.  But first, let’s dissect the misery of Chicago and Boston fans.
Cubs and Red Sox fans, oh please.  You have it so rough.  In Chicago, Da Bears steam roll through the 85 season on their way to a Super Bowl victory.  Then to top it off, Michael Jordan falls into your lap bringing 6 championships in the 90s.  Oh boo hoo, I sympathize. You call that a curse? I don’t want to hear it from you either Boston fans, you pompous jerks.  How do you survive?  Not only did you end the curse of the bambino by winning the World Series in 2004, you followed it up with another in 2007.  If that isn’t enough, The Boston Celtics managed to win 16 championships up until your stinking Red Sox won the 04 title.  Then guess what, they add another banner to the rafters in 2008.  Sickening, some curse you got there.  Even worse, Mr. Personality, Bill Belichick comes to town in 2000.  He proceeds to win 3 Super Bowls by drafting a QB in the 6th round from all places, Michigan.  That hurts…yeah, what a curse.

Other teams have claimed to be cursed, but its mere jealousy.  All teams want a curse but few really have it.  I guess enough has been said.  Now, I give you the ultimate story of a curse and yes, it’s a painful, real curse.  You may want to take a walk, grab something to drink prior to reading this one.  Go hug your wife, kiss your kids, pet your dog.  Anything, and I mean do anything but don’t grab a drink.  When you start reading, you will only want more drinks.  It’s not worth it.  No pills either, far too dangerous in this situation.

Here we go, I’m a Cleveland fan.  There, I said it.  Go ahead and laugh, get it out of your system.  Live it up jokester; I hope you are having fun.  Not only have I put up with the misery of the Browns, I’ve also been fortunate enough to live through the horrors of the Indians and Cavs.  In Cleveland they name their points of misery. You want to talk curse?  Come on Cubs fans I’ve got your curse.

As a point of reference my days as a hard core, intense, passionate, far too obsessed fan really starts in the early 1980s.

Let’s start with the Cavaliers.  The Cavs started in the NBA in 1970.  Yep, you guessed it, no championships.  There have been several good teams over the years but none reached the pinnacle.  In May of 1988, in Cleveland, the Cavs managed to take a one point lead in the decisive game of the 1st round of the playoffs.  Misery resulted in such fashion, that it’s now named, “The Shot”.  Everyone on the planet knew Michael Jordan would take the last shot with his team trailing by a single point.  Wisely, the Cavs doubled MJ on the inbounds play.  Wow, you are such an incredible guesser.  You are correct; he got the ball anyway and knocked down an incredible shot at the buzzer for the win.  The Cavs are sent home.  Painful and nauseating…
If by chance you want to share in my misery or maybe you are gloating, here is a link to “The Shot”:

Despite the excruciating loss, the Cavs appeared to be heading for a title.  Instead, multiple injuries to star players resulted.  The curse is alive (more details to follow).  The Curse is so strong it drove Cavs All Star Center, Brad Daughtery (retired due to injury) from a college basketball analyst to a Nascar analyst!!!  Incredible…

The Cavs finally caught a break, quite possibly the biggest break in the history of the franchise.  They won the 2003 draft lottery which gave them the rights to local phenom, The Chosen One, Lebron James.  James, as a high school player, donned the cover of Sports Illustrated.  Finally, the jackpot.  James exploded on the scene and greatness was sure to follow.  Quickly, the Cavs arrived on the NBA scene.  In June of 2004, the Cavaliers agreed to help out young stud Carlos Boozer by letting him out of his minimum contract.  Boozer was drafted in the 2nd round and proved to be vastly underpaid and was outplaying his contract.  What did the Cavs get for their kindness? Boozer, in one of the shadiest moments in sports, signed with the Utah Jazz!  The Cavs could have paid him the minimum another year and had him for years to come!!  Of course, the curse wreaks its ugly head.  Go back to Alaska you back stabbing, Benedict Arnold *#&$(*&@.  Sorry, drinking yet?  You can relive the nightmare here:

Thankfully, with the best player in the league, Lebron James, the Cavs quickly bounced back making it to the NBA Finals in 2007.  Wow, nice guess you *&#*($#.  Yeah, hilarious.  The Cavs were swept mercifully by the Spurs.  Then in 2008 they were knocked out of the playoffs by eventual champion, The Boston Celtics.  Simply disgusting.  2009 looks like a whole new season as at this time, the Cavs have the best record in the NBA.  Did I mention, their All Star Center has a chipped bone in his ankle and is out for an extended period of time? Stinking curse.  Even with Superman wearing#23 on his uniform,  jumping centers with a single bound, we must remain cautious.  After all, we are Cleveland fans.

On with the depression.  The Cleveland Indians last won a World Series title in 1948.  That is hard to even fathom.  Can you imagine? 1948!!!  Of course there is heartbreak here as well.  How about game 7 of the 1997 World Series for starters.  Second baseman Tony Fernandez, known for his defensive prowess, instead of turning a double play, you guessed it an error.  Tribe loses yet again…The 97 Indians were loaded with talent but couldn’t pull it off.  The 99 Indians were the same, check out this roster! Basically a freaking all star team and still couldn’t win one lousy title.  All we want is one title!

To top it off, Manny leaves for the cursed team, the Red Sox.  You guessed it, wins two titles.  Jim Thome lies to all of Cleveland stating he loves it there, it’s not about the money blah blah blah, he leaves.

Then the incredible happens.  Slow talking, boring errrr Charlie Manuel, former manager of the Tribe, wins the freaking Series as the manager with the Philadelphia Phillies.  I believe Charlie’s  postgame press conference is still going on.  Cry me a freaking river Philadelphia fans.  Oh that’s real funny a river that catches on fire.   Haha, you’re a freaking comedian (Cuyahoga river caught on fire).  Shove a Philly Steak right up your *#$&*#(&$@.  ROCKY IS NOT REAL.  Deal with that Philly fans.

Ok, by now, you probably think you have a good feel for what incredible pain is.  Not even close, the worst is yet to come.

The Cleveland Browns last won a championship in 1964.  They were led by the greatest player in the history of football, Jim Brown.  After Brown’s retirement in 1966, at the age of 29(only in Cleveland), the Browns were subpar until the early 80s.  Then came The Kardiac Kids led by gunslinger Brian Sipe.  The team caught the eye of the sports world.  In January of 1981, the Browns were trailing 14-12 in the final minutes of a frigid game with the Oakland Raiders.  You are probably expecting a missed attempt at a winning field goal, nope, even worse.  Instead, for some unknown reason, the Browns attempted a pass play that was intercepted in the end zone.  Yep, its named, Red Right 88.  Wow…

The Browns went through several lean years which led to drafting local hero (my all time favorite player) Bernie Kosar.  Kosar, in 1985 quickly got into the starting QB role and led the Browns to a division victory, ultimately losing to Dan Marino and the Dolphins.  Not too depressing considering Kosar is but a rookie and will lead this team back!

In 1986, he did just that.  The Browns faced the Denver Broncos in the AFC Championship game in Cleveland.  The Browns take a 7 point lead with around 5 minutes left in the game.  The Broncos have 98 yards to tie the game.  Yep, another named misery, The Drive.  Elway led the Broncos the length of the field and won the game in overtime.  A very painful loss indeed.  But most Cleveland fans, as was I, were proud of the Browns and knew Bernie would lead us back.

In 1987, he did just that.  The Browns started horribly this time around in Denver.  In the 2nd half, it looked like our turn.  Kosar, calmly led the troops down the field looking to tie the game.  With little time left, Kosar hands the ball to Byner (note: I stand up and yell touchdown at this moment), the crowd is stunned, Browns players raise their hands, exuberance in all of Browns land.  Announcers Enberg and Olsen, “wait a minute the ball appears to be loose, the Broncos have it.”  This happens at the 3 yard line.  Yep, another named misery, The Fumble. Oh my, the misery.
At the end of the 1988 season, Head Coach Marty Schottenheimer has had enough and resigns.  We have a guy named Bill Cowher who played in Cleveland and coached under Marty that could have been hired.  Nope, the Browns don’t hire Cowher.  Eventually, Cowher goes to arch rival The Pittsburgh Steelers.  You guessed it, Cowher wins a Super Bowl.
The Browns make it back to the AFC Championship game in 1989 but this time they are no match for the Broncos.  After the season, the Browns trade Earnest Byner (remember The Fumble) to the Washington Redskins for Mike Oliphant.  Who??? Mike “Freaking” Oliphant.  Incredible…You guessed it, Byner goes on to win a Super Bowl.

Things only get worse.  In 1991, the Browns hire Bill Parcells’ disciple, Bill Belichick.  The Browns improve under “BELICHOKE!” but things get worse.  In his infinite wisdom, in 1993 he simply cuts Brown’s legend Bernie Kosar with no credible back up.  The city is in an uproar.  Man, I hate that guy.  In 94, Belichick leads the Browns to the playoffs, maybe this guy isn’t so bad, they get smoked by the hated Steelers.  Man I hate that guy.

Then, everything fell apart.  The most hated man in the history of Cleveland sports, the low life bag of wind no good stinking lying filthy human being, if he even qualifies for that, Art Modell, meets with Baltimore politicians under the cloud of darkness and agrees to move The Cleveland Browns to Baltimore.  The entire sports world was surprised and crushed.  Even Pittsburgh fans were outraged.  What a despicable low life coward Modell turned out to be.  He moved the team to Baltimore and called them the Baltimore Heathens, I mean Ravens. So 1995 is the end you must be thinking.  You probably have had enough of this melancholy epic.  Sorry to tell you, there is plenty more.

Belichick is fired at the end of the Browns as we then knew it later to be hired by The New England Patriots.  You guessed it, Belichick goes on to win 3 Super Bowls…errrrr.  Boston fans I hope you choke on clam chowder.  The ultimate proof life isn’t fair, Art Modell and the Heathens win a Super Bowl.  Modell goes from 1964 to 1995 and cannot win a title but does in 2000 with the Ravens.  Unreal.  Baltimore fans, I hope every crab cake in your pathetic city rots!!  I bet Cal Ripken was on roids like the rest of them!!!  Take that, the streak’s a fraud!!!  I don’t really mean that.  It’s not Cal’s fault.  Baltimore’s star LB Ray Lewis was arrested on murder charges during the previous Super Bowl in Atlanta.  Yep, he walked.  If he was a Brown, no doubt the curse would have him playing prison ball with Michael Vick and Rae Carruth. http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/football/nfl/features/bloody_monday/news/2000/02/25/part1/

However, I do believe the curse wasn’t the reason the Browns moved. I believe the curse wanted the Browns to stay so it could punish us even more.  The curse expressed its anger at Modell moving the team by tearing his scrotum.  Ouch!

The Browns kept their history and colors, returning as an expansion team in 1999.  Still no Super Bowls and only 2 winning seasons.  Here is a quick recap of the Browns since 99:  A QB who cried- Tim Couch, A RB named Ben Gay-no joke- #1 pick Courtney Brown hurt entire career, Spurgeon Wynn-Who?, Cut opening day starting QB after 1 game, 3 coaches fired, so on so forth.  The worst is probably losing a game because of a helmet toss.  No joke, Dwayne Rudd thought he sacked the KC QB to end the game, instead the QB threw the football straight up in the air, a player caught it and continued to run, eventually tackled with time expired.  Of course, Rudd was flagged for a 15 yard penalty, the game cannot end on a defensive penalty, KC kicks a field goal with no time on the clock, Browns lose.  The curse is alive.  In 2007, the Browns go 10-6 with a young, talented team.  In 2008, they play horrible and a ton of injuries occur.  To the glee of all Browns fans, the future, QB Brady Quinn finally gets his chance.  Quinn plays well, then breaks his finger which requires surgery.  Amazing…To top it off, while is finger is in a splint, a Browns defensive lineman punches Quinn during a skirmish in the locker room.  Only in Cleveland…only in Cleveland.
So you may wonder what caused the curse.  Many theories exist.  It’s possible someone did it unknowingly.  Many theorize, Jim Brown himself caused the curse in anger of how Modell treated him when he was filming The Dirty Dozen.  Could be…
But after years of suffering and asking God why, I think I found the truth.

The curse didn’t start in 1964, the last year Cleveland had a champion, it started sometime in the 1969 time frame. The curse will now forever be known as the Raquel Welch curse!!!  She starred in 100 Rifles with Jim Brown which included steamy scenes.  At that point, an interracial scene like that stirred up a lot of talk and was viewed as highly controversial.  Somewhere in the moment of the hype, Raquel got angry and said something to the effect, “Curse that damn Cleveland!!!!!”  Today, I come with meekness and humbleness and ask with all sincerity, Raquel, Please think about everything you have said and take the curse back.  We beg you Raquel, we beg you.

As I’ve spilled out my heart, I think all of you “cursed” cities realize your curse is simply a small drought and really not that bad.  You now understand that only Cleveland has a curse.  So when you get down, frustrated and want to find Bartman and string him up in Wrigley, just remember, Cleveland has it worst.  We own and will cling to our curse, you cling to your championships.
I leave with a motto that all Cleveland fans are very familiar with: WAIT UNTIL NEXT YEAR…

By Scott Dryden
DFN Sports Staff Writer

All season long we have heard how the Boston Celtics were the best team in basketball. They started the season 27-2, the best record after 29 games in NBA history, and seemed poised to make a run at another NBA Championship. But in the shadows were the Cleveland Cavaliers, winners of 20 of their first 23 games while getting little to no media attention or respect. Friday night’s showdown of Boston @ Cleveland had all of the story lines: the defending champs versus the young Cavaliers, a rematch of the Eastern Conference Semifinal round that went to 7 games last season, the “Chosen One” versus the “Boston Three Party” and more. Cleveland came in 18-0 at home and 28-6 on the season while Boston, losers of 6 of their last 8 games and 29-8 on the season, had just recently been passed by Cleveland in the standings.

Cleveland came out strong leading 33-23 after the 1st period but seemed to lose their intensity in the 2nd and 3rd quarters. But the Cavs took a 12-point lead into the 4th quarter thanks to a 13-point 3rd quarter by LeBron, and Cleveland never looked back in the 98-83 win on ESPN. Not only does Cleveland remain undefeated at home on the season, but Cleveland (29-6) now leads Boston by 3 (29-9) in the loss column and Orlando by 2 (29-8). The importance of tihs is obvious; home court advantage in the playoffs. It was Boston who was the #1 seed in the Eastern Conference last season and won 4 games at home while losing all 3 on the road in Cleveland in the Eastern Conference semifinals.

Next up for the Cavs is a Tuesday night game @ Memphis (11-26). Fans can find a great selection of Cleveland Cavaliers apparel & hats online through DFN Sports and LeBron James Fathead posters over at Sports Shop toshow their love of the Cavaliers to all of their friends.

While the Evil Empire of the New York Yankees have been paying to have most of the headlines this offseason, the Yankees are not the only team with changes from their 2008 roster. Both Ohio teams look to improve on disappointing 2008 seasons as they are lead by experienced General Managers. Reds’ GM Walt Jocketty has been busy during the offseason, but does not have a lot of transactions to show for it. The rumored Jermaine Dye trade for Homer Bailey fell through when Cincinnati did not want to take on so much salary (sound familiar?), so the Reds’ most significant move was dealing Ryan Freel toBaltimore for catcher Ramon Hernandez. Cincinnati has also added OF Will Taveras and lefty reliever Arthur Rhodes after signing both free agents to 2-year deals.

Cleveland, on the other hand, has made a bigger splash this offseason as GM Mark Shapiro continues to work his magic. The acquisition of IF Mark DeRosa could be huge as he comes off a career-best 2008 with the Cubs, but the additions of SP Carl Pavano and closer Kerry Wood add depth and experience to the team. Franklin Gutierrez is gone after being dealt in a 3-team, 12-player deal.

For more 2009 MLB offseason trades, signings & transactions, look to our friends over at MLB Center where they are keeping up to date on every MLB team.

Cleveland Browns owner Randy Lerner said that the Browns would hire a GM before a head coach after the firings of Romeo Crennel and Phil Savage. Something made Lerner change his mind. The Cleveland Browns announced today the hiring of Eric Mangini, the former New York Jets head coach. “Man-genius” as he was called two years ago after leading the Jets to a fantastic 1-year turnaround was 23-25 in 3 seasons in New York but was fired after his team began the season 8-3 only to fall out of the playoffs with a 9-7 finish in 2008.

While I like the hiring of Mangini, I wonder why the rush to do so, and why did they hire a coach before the GM? Any good businessman wants a major say in who works for him, and now a GM will have to be brought in with his head coach already in place. The move would have made more sense had the Browns not fired former GM Phil Savage, the man who turned the Browns’ roster into a respectable one with the drafting of Braylon Edwards, Brady Quinn, Joe Thomas & more as well as the free agent signings of Eric Steinbach, Dave Zastudil & Jamal Lewis. Savage was also responsible for trades that brought linemen Hank Fraley, Corey Williams & Shaun Rodgers to Cleveland.

So now the Browns have to replace Savage and already names are falling from consideration. Eagles’ GM Tom Heckert has withdrawn his name after the hiring of Mangini and it is likely that Patriots’ VP Scott Pioli will also withdraw his name from consideration after the hiring of Mangini.